An interesting end to a 4 month hiatus

Welp, it's been 4 months (to the day) since my last post. My bad.

I am currently on my summer vacation, one of the many, well deserved, perks to being a teacher. But, let me tell you, I have certainly not stopped working. Not a day goes by, or even an hour for that matter, that I don't think about my kids, or my content, or my plans for next year.

Right now, I am sitting in my gorgeous hotel room at the Lodge at Torrey Pines in La Jolla (San Diego) California.

I am at the Sally Ride Science Academy Conference completely paid for by Exxon Mobile. I will be honest and say that before about 5pm today, I had no idea what this conference was about, it was just a free trip to San Diego where I would get to learn some stuff about science. Boy was I wrong. It is going to be so much more than that.

About an hour ago I was sitting at the reception dinner listening to Sally Ride speak and I had an overwhelming feeling take over me. For those of you who know me, I suffer from massive anxiety when it comes to needles, and this was a very similar feeling I was experiencing. In short, I thought I was having a panic attack. I was light headed and dizzy, and no, it was not because of the open bar they provided us with. I was light headed and dizzy, heart pounding and feeling very anxious because my brain was working much harder and running much faster than my body could handle. I was so EXCITED. I was thinking about change. I was thinking about the new 6th graders I was going to meet. I was thinking about everything I was capable of doing for the kids.

Sally Ride is very much into getting children, specifically young girls and kids with hard financial situations, excited about science. This is the point of this conference. They are training us to get kids excited about science and I was beyond excited about implementing this in my classroom. This is a train the trainer conference, so I am going to be in charge of training many teachers in HISD to implement this. This was also very exciting to me because I am a part of this movement. At first I was just a small piece of the puzzle, but every day I become a bigger part of it.

Before the reception I was discussing the achievement gap with a woman, Karen, as well as the budget crisis. Later, I found out she is Sally Ride's business partner, Dr. Karen Flammer, and also a research physicist at UCSD. Me, a 23 year old who had just finished my first year of teaching after studying to be in ADVERTISING, was discussing the achievement gap with someone who is working, diligently, to end it by working with Sally Ride, THE Sally Ride. Wow.

Part of my excited anxiety attack had to do with the fact that I can see myself doing this for a long time. And I don't necessarily mean teaching forever, but I think I will be in education for a while. Also, it is quite strange to me being from Illinois, going to college in Illinois, and thinking I would always be in Illinois that I currently reside in Houston, TX and that I am newly a big fan of San Diego. I could end up anywhere. My life is so unpredictable. Yikes.

So, what's next? We shall see.

Until next time (which hopefully won't be in November),

Caroline

Witty

This morning I forgot an important Soccer paper in the computer lab. During breakfast I realized it and asked one of my students to go get it for me. I described the paper, but I didn't know exactly where it was. He came back pretty quickly with the paper and I said, "Thank you Erick! You're a life saver!" He responded, "No problem Miss, you're a science teacher."

Nothin like a good laugh in the AM.

Caro

Donorschoose

Here is the most recent link for my DonorsChoose Project.

http://www.donorschoose.org/donors/proposal.html?id=528391

DonorChoose is a place where public school teachers can go on and request supplies and people can donate to those projects. I have had a lot of success with this and my next project is a bunch of cool interactive supplies for Science. Go ahead and check it out- I'm not asking you to necessarily give money to my project, but it is a very cool site that is worth taking a look at!

Caro

Responsibility

As if I did not have enough responsibility on my plate...

Between trying to change the lives of the youth of America in the classroom and on the field I am now the proud owner of a puppy.

I was at Soccer practice on Wednesday when I heard some growling outside the fence on the adjacent street. I looked over and saw a big dog attacking a little puppy! I ran outside and the puppy ran to me. It was love at first sight. I asked the neighbors if it was their dog or if they knew whose it was, and had no luck. My family has been in the business of "saving puppies" for as long as I can remember. However, saving puppies meant scooping up lost dogs and finding their owners and returning them. This is not how it went down...

I picked him up and brought him inside the gated soccer field. I did not know what to do with him. He was kind of dirty, but not too bad and was very mild tempered, not biting or anything. He started to cry so I decided to put him down, he ran to the soccer players who were mid game, straight at the ball. Now, I was really in love. I ran to go get him and picked him up again. He was really little and would be able to get through the gates, I didn't want him to get attacked again, or worse, hit by a car. Now, I seriously did not know what to do. He was SO cute. He didn't have any tags. When some little girls came up to me and asked to pet "my puppy" I saw us growing old together. (Ha.) They asked me what his name was and without hesitation I answered, "Riggins." I've been a dog lover my whole life and knew that eventually I would like to get a dog of my own. Eventually being the key word here. But, knowing I eventually wanted to get a dog, naturally, I had been thinking of names, naturally.

My family's dog's name is Cocoa. She is a chocolate lab, original, right? Give me a break I was 8- the creativity in me had not started swirling around in my head yet. In college I thought naming a dog Chief would be cute (Chief Illiniwek), but I got over that pretty quickly. Then I was introduced to the Television show Friday Night Lights. Tim Riggins is one of the main characters. He's pretty much a bad-ass with a huge heart and a love for football. My perfect man. My love for Tim Riggins was so apparent that this year for my birthday, my roommates got me a Riggins sweatshirt which I wear constantly. This puppy just looked like a Riggins.

So, as you see, a response to the question of "what's its name?" was so simple. Riggins is a bad-ass with a big heart- and he even has a love for football!

I carried him around soccer practice for another hour. He was so sweet. I texted my roommates: "I'm bringing a puppy home. His name is Riggins." At this point I wasn't sure if I was joking or not. Then soccer practice was over and I was pretty sure I was bringing him home. I wasn't sure if I was going to keep him, but I wanted to at least take him to the vet and see if anyone was missing a puppy. I took him to Petsmart after practice where they checked for a chip and called the non-emergency police to see if anyone was looking for a lost puppy. The woman said to me "If you're not going to take him home I will." And then, as he sat next to me on the bench at petsmart, resting his head on my leg, I knew I was taking him home. It was up to the roomies whether or not we were keeping him, because I loved this dog already.

Needless to say, Lauryn and Maria love him too. He is really hard not to love.

The question remains will he have a good, fair life if we keep him? I keep thinking about what his life was like before I took him home. There is the option that he was in a home where he was loved. There are also many more horrible situations he could have been, and mostly likely was, in. The families in the community around Deady do not live in the best conditions. They have a lot of kids and little income. When you bring dogs into that mix it's hard to see how they can be properly cared for if these kids aren't even being properly cared for. A lot of families have so many dogs because they can not afford to get them fixed and they just have puppies galore.

I would obviously like to think that I saved him, and he will have a better life, but in the back of my mind I can't help but think that I stole a puppy from a small child. So far, this has not been the case, no calls from Petsmart/non-emergency police, and no lost dog signs around Deady.

He is so loved here. Financially, it's not going to be easy, but he has food, toys, treats, and a crate so far. The responsibility is huge but I am willing to take it on right now, Riggins is so worth it! He's good with people- so mild mannered and passive. I've taken him to happy hour at West Alabama Ice House and brunch at Barnaby's so far. He is just so chill! He barks at other dogs sometimes but then he gets over it. At West Alabama he sat on the table and hung out, watched us play horse shoes, and basketball too.

At Barnaby's he sat in a chair for a little bit but then took a nap under the table.

He sleeps a lot but also runs around a ton. He's just so fun! I figured out that he is probably a black lab pitbull mix. From what I've heard they seem to be very good, loyal dogs- and so far Riggins is living up to that! Day 5 of life with puppy has been great, I hope it stays that way!

Texas for Life.

Care

Boredom

My job is by no means boring. There is not a dull moment between the hours of 8am and 4pm. Sometimes, I do not appreciate the lack of boredom in my life, but when boredom hits, boy, it hits me hard. Right now, I am bored out of my mind. Our second semester of alternative certification classes at the University of St. Thomas started today. I feel as if I am dying a slow death. I'm sorry but this woman is so dry and she just keeps talking and talking. The only thrill I have is once and a while nodding my head- whether it be in response to something she said (I don't exactly know what she said, but it was definitely a question) or because I'm nodding off. Thankfully, I am suffering through this class with very good company, but wow, I am bored. It's almost worse that I'm in this class with all my friends and we can only look at each other in misery. Get me back into my crazy classroom STAT. 3 hours of this? Who thought of this torture? Apparently some guys named Fries and Halladay- the only reason I remember those names are because I'm hungry and would much rather be watching baseball. Oh, and one of our books is by Michael Jordan, that made me giggle. Gosh- I'm bored. Without the craziness of my 6th graders, there is a lot of time to think about everything I have to do. That truly frightens me. So, basically, nothing good is coming out of this boredom. I can't even learn right now. One thing our teacher did say, that I heard (and retained), is that people learn better when there is no pressure and they are not under stress. (Cory says hi). No wonder I can't learn anything. So distracted. Class is over. Adios.

Happiness

"Happiness is not a destination. It is a mood, it is not permanent. It comes and goes and if people thought that way then maybe people would find happiness more often."

4:28pm: Right now, I am not happy. I'm disappointed, frustrated, and pretty much overall pissed off. And, no, it is not because my job is the most difficult and stressful thing I have attempted to do in my entire life, but because the Bears are losing, and Jay Cutler is a baby for giving up.

4:30pm: Now, I'm happy. The Bears just scored and it is a one possession game. Wahooooo! Happiness.

Happiness is a mood. It comes and goes with events, situations, successes, and failures. Everyone wants to be happy and therefore see it as this destination, something they need to get to. People want a fairytale where they live a happy life- this can be a quite depressing outlook. Everyday you don't have that fairytale makes you sad, and if you see others leading a happy life (or so you think) it could make you even more depressed.

Everyone has heard the phrase "Live in the moment." Well I live for the happy moments. At least once a day a kid makes me laugh, and even if it's for 20 seconds, I'm happy. Every Bears game there is a good play that gets me on my feet excited, and even if the Packers turn right around and score 3 plays later, I was happy for a good 45 seconds. It's all about the small victories, and if I put my small victories all together, I have a life full of happiness.

If you dwell on all the crap in your life, I promise you, you will not "find happiness." I don't think it's even possible to find happiness... I believe happiness finds you. This happens by the decisions you make, the steps you take in your life, making the choice to open up and feel happiness. Do things that make you happy damnit!

4:52pm: Not happy. Bears are on their 3rd string quarterback who just threw a pick six. Looks like my Superbowl hopes are dwindling.

But look on the bright side... we don't have to be embarrassed in the Superbowl! I know being positive all the time is hard to do, but it's worth a shot. And, you have to know that you don't have to be happy all the time. It's normal to be angry, upset, sad, frustrated, disappointed...but it doesn't need to define you- let your happy moments and joy define you. I'm sure you'll find that this will rub off on others, and being around other happy people will make you even happier!

4:56pm: HAPPINESS! Bears score, 21-14 with 4:43 left! THERE'S A CHANCE! Singing Bear Down makes me happy.

So, don't make happiness a destination. Let it be something that happens daily. The small victories, that's what I'm living for these days.

Go Bears.

Maybe you're wondering where that happiness quote came from, and I'm sure you'll be ecstatic to know that it is from the CW television show "One Tree Hill"